The Nephew’s – Phantom Gourmet

If the Phantom really had a Nephew of his own, he would hopefully get along with him better than The Nephew’s restaurant in Freetown, Massachusetts.

Atmosphere(7)

Decor matches the food-nothing very exciting. Brass railings and stained wood decorate the dining room.

Menu(6)

The three B’s: bland, boring, and blase. The “Italian Dinners” and “American Favorites” are terminally routine.

Portions(7)

Although Phantom’s veal portion was weight-watcher sized, most entrees pack enough to satisfy a normal appetite.

Appetizers(4)

Garlic bread was nothing more than white bread with some butter and garlic powder. There was so much iceberg lettuce in the salads, Phantom thought it could sink an ocean liner. Your only sensible option is the quality clam chowder.

Food and Drink(7)

Phantom’s New York sirloin was decent. Baked stuffed shrimp with crab meat made the Phantom crabby. Veal scaloppini was average at best. Most satisfying item was the Nephew’s favorite pizza with chicken and broccoli. Phantom enjoyed the Sam Adams White Ale on tap. Potatoes and veggies taste like Birdseye.

Desserts(6)

Bill Cosby would be proud to know chocolate pudding is one of the four choices. Stick with the Black Forest cake and take Donnie Brasco’s advice on the rest: “Fuggetaboutit.”

Service(9)

At least the waitress was amiable, courteous, and prompt.

Cleanliness(9)

Everything’s in fine fettle, from the dining room carpets to the tile floors in the bathroom.

Parking(7)

Just a Mo Vaughn fly ball from Exit 8 on Route 140 in Freetown. Big parking lot. There’s a cash machine right next door, and you’ll need it; Nephew’s does not take credit cards.

Value(8)

Pizzas average about $6. Entrees run $10 to $17. Most sandwiches under $5. Forgettable food at reasonable prices.

Total Score: 70